


The heaven that I undress with my tears

by AgenteYumi



Category: Eldarya (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Drama, F/M, I just want to watch the world burn, Romance, Spoilers from episode 13 and last episodes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-16
Updated: 2017-06-16
Packaged: 2018-11-14 19:03:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11214300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AgenteYumi/pseuds/AgenteYumi
Summary: Just remember that I will love you in another life. I love you in another life.





	The heaven that I undress with my tears

**Author's Note:**

> As always, english is not my first language, so maybe I could have some mistakes translating this.  
> Please tell me if there's any and I will correct it.

She looked like if she was asleep. Exactly as how she looked the nights when they were away from the H.Q., while he was watching over her on the darkness. She looked like on those dawns that they shared together, after the long nights that he spended drowning on her kisses.

Such a relief.

 

 

He still remembers that day. The sun shining, few clouds on an azure sky. It was just a picnic with some of the friends. Karenn was chating with Alajea while Chrome went with food for them both. Ykhar was doing some flower crowns. Kero was drawing. Ezarel and Nevra were playing a game that Erika taught them. Valkyon, Miiko and Leiftan were part of the game too.

 "Ezarel! Hand!" the human nagged him.

"Why your stupid game doesn't allow us to use the hands? That would be more practical!"

"Because that's the idea!" and she showed her tongue to mock him.

"I don't understand why... why you Valkyon is your goalkeeper. It's so hard to make a goal!" Miiko complained. 

"Pure strategy, dear Miiko" Leiftan laughed. He was part of the affected team but still though that it was hilarious.

"Then on the next picnic I will ask Jamon to come and he will be my growlkeeper!"

"Goalkeeper!" the human replied.

The game continued. Miiko and her team founded a way to make a pair of anotations, tying the game. Valkyon's team was going for the anotation to untie it. Nevra passed the ball to Erika and she was preparing an espectacular shot to the goal that was guarded by the son of the moon but then she fell.

 

 

 

 

"So typical of the clumsy human!" Ezarel mocked her. "Your team was going to win and you failed!"

Erika didn't get up right on that moment. She didn't even replied to the elf's words.

"Stop that, Ezarel!" Karenn defended her friend. "Don't listen to him, Erika! Everyone can fall like that! So get up and try again!"

"But it happened to her!" Ezarel continued.

 

 

Still, she didn't get up. Valkyon leaved his position to see what happened to her. Since the girl didn't tried to avoid hitting her head by putting her hands, he was afraid of something worse.

"Ezared, stop" Valkyon ordered to him as if the elf was one of his subordinates, not his colegue. Ezarel obeyed instantly but offended by that voice tone. "Erika fainted. It's weird because that just happened once, a time when we were making..."

The man stopped, blushed of remembering the scene. The guard didn't had a reason to know about their bedroom business. The golden-eyed man started to remove the jewels and belts and to untie Erika's clothes, trying to help her blood to run better. He turned her head to the side, just in case that she threw up. Leiftan took her feet and  raised them a little. 

"She's breathing. That's a good signal" Nevra informed.

"Erika just needs some minutes to rest and she will be fine" the elf added.

Karenn helped the rest of the guard to put together everything they took to eat.

"But anyway we need to leave. The sooner that EweleÏn can see her, the better." said the little vampire. "Also there's some rain clouds coming."

Valkyon took Erika on his arms and they started to walk back to the HQ. Some of the members started to murmur, worried. Erika didn't seemed to be so well, being so pale.

"We knew that this was going to happen" Ezarel muttered. And bited his lip.

 

Ouf of the infirmary everyone were walking on circles, awaiting for Eweleïn's diagnostic. When she finally appeared, the albino giant almost ran over her, eager to know.

"There's two news. A bad one and a good one. The good one is that she's finally awake" and the doctor tried to smile, in vain. "The bad one is that I don't understand what's happening with her organism".

"What do you mean?" Chrome asked.

"Erika's faeric heritage helped her to survive here more time that we expected for her. But her human side isn't made to survive on the enviroment of Eldarya. She seems to have some poisoning on her blood and I think that I had readed about something like that time ago, on some of the books that I readed before the Library's disaster"

 

 

 

"With an antidote she could get cured, isn't it?" Karen inquired. "It's just a poisoning".

 

The elf's silence transmited her impotence. She wasn't used to say that kind of news. After all, Eldarya's medical knowledge was pretty much efficient.

"I'm afrait that it's not the case. What I readed was about a lot of human people exposed to a certain kind of energetic force. They said that it was such a terrible event. So few of them survived to the contact with that force and those who did... I think that dying would have been better for them. If Erika is already on her breaking point, then I don't know how much time she has left."

 

 

 

"I guess that those times near the Crystal just made the process more fast than it should have been" Miiko replied. "If her body isn't able to process the Crystal's energy, that's what poisoned her".

 

"It's a posibility" completed the doctor.

 

Valkyon punched the wall, leaving a sinking on it. The pain on his knucles just made more real Eweleïn's words.

 

"Can I see her" the Captain asked. His voice cracked.

 

"She can't see you like that" Alajea sugested. "Maybe Eweleïn is wrong and if she sees you like that, Erika would get worse."

 

"I really want to be wrong this time" the doctor whispered, hugging herself. The man with the silver hair tried to console her by putting his hand on her shoulder. "You can see Erika if you want, she asked for you as soon as she woke up.

 

He could feel his heart running as if it wanted to get out of his body. Maybe if that happened, everything would be less painful. He didn't wanted to go closer to the bed where she was because that would be the moment when he would have to fight the truth. Anyway, Erika seemed to be fine.

 

"I'm sorry" the human apologized. "I ruined the picnic for everyone"

 

That meaned that Eweleïn didn't told her anything.

 

"No, no. Maybe you just got insolated." Valkyon took her hand. "How do you feel now?"

 

"Better. Eweleïn told me to rest and come here again if I felt weak again."

 

He hugghed her.

 

"You better listen to her".

 

 

Some time passed between that episode and two more with her fainting and going to the infirmary, with little time of distance between them. At the third time she didn't leaved the infirmary. Valkyon went to see her every day, taking Erika's pet or flowers.

 

"You think that Eweleïn will let me go soon?" she asked to him every day.

 

"I think so" was his answer.

 

Sometimes he spended the night with her, watching over her sleep. Everyday she looked more and more demacrated and tired, but he always reassured her that she will be better soon, even if his own words hurted. He had to sound convincing in order to avoid any suffering to her.

 

All her friends came to see her when they could. Karuto even took some desserts. He asked recipes and made them for her.

 

Erika spended less time awake a week before her third setback. Sometimes she didn't woke up on the entire day.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"I swear on the Oracle that I'm trying to find a way to cure her but we don't have enough knowledge about how the energy of Eldarya affects non faeric creatures" The voice of Ezarel sounded as if it was his guilt to don't have enough knowledge to help his friend. The three leaders of guard were drinking that night. "Maybe we should have been more strict with her health records when she came here."

"We should have returned her to her world sooner if we had knew that this could happen" Nevra sighed. "We shouldn't..."

"I shouldn't had gave her that potion." Valkyon stopped him. "Even if she could go back, if she could only move on her actual state, we don't know if on her world they have knowledge of how to cure her. All that EweleÏn remembers about what she readed is that even the descendants of those people got affected too. And if Erika is supposed to get well, that would had happened time ago".

That said, Valkyon drank all the beer on his jar, trying to numb his mind to the pain of the truth. The jar hitted the table and Karuto protested to the damage to his furniture. The big captain was falling appart but he was trying to keep a good face everytime that he went to see his loved.

Erika soon suspected things. That night, having a presage about why Valkyon smelled as if he was drinking a lot, she let the bomb fall.

"I'm not going to get well, right?" she muttered, afraid of what she just said.

Her lover was silent. She looked her hands. Her inferior lip was trembling, as her tears started to fall.

"Why did you lied to me? Why tell me that I would get well soon?" she complained, sobbing.

"We didn't wanted to worry you" was his answer. "We wanted for you to be happy on your last days".

His words hurted them both.

"I'm going to die soon?" she wailed. "So you even hided from the the fact that I'm dying? Since when you know that?"

Silence. The man didn't dared to get closer to her. He had his eyes looking to the floor, as the time when he had to apologize for the damned potion.

"Goddamit! Answer me Valkyon! If I'm going to die I have the right to know!" Erika yelled at him.

"We knew about this since the picnic" he finally talked. "EweleÏn says that maybe your faeric heritage has helped you to survive but your human side has resented it and you finally... collapsed. She thinks that she readed something similar on a medical book on the Library, a blood poisoning for a suddenly released energy. Eweleïn readed that a lot of humans died for the contact with it."

"Posibly she's talking about radioactivity" the girl reflected, trying to compare the concept that they were talking about. The silence was present for a minutes while they both were thinking about the weeks before that moment. "I appreciate that you tried to make me happy. But what about you?"

"I don't want to lose you too." he confesed, letting himself fall. He felt like that lost boy, running away from the destruction of his home just to lose what he had left soon after reaching the head quarters. "We just planned a life togheter. I can't lose you".

Erika sat down on the bed with the few forces that she still had. She looked at her left hand. After telling Valkyon about the marriage traditions of Earth, he made himself a ring, the same that was shining on the moonlight that sad night. The party was going to be on two more seasons. Even Huang Hua had asked to participate on the nuptial ceremony. They wanted to fuse Eldarya's traditions with her past home ways.

"We still can have some of that" she proposed to him. "We just... have to talk with everyone and make it to happen sooner. It doesn't matter if it isn't as we dreamed it, it's only important that we should be there and the people who loves us. Even this hospital robe can be my wedding gown" she tried to laugh. Valkyon took her hands and kissed them. Erika caressed his hair, tenderly.

"Sure. I will tell them" he promised.

 

Valkyon imagined that day. He saw her reaching the Altar, with a beautiful dress, white as seafoam, her hair decorated with the most beautiful flowers of the cherry tree, smiling, Jamon walking at her side, on her father's absense. The light at her back making everyone look at her as beautiful as him saw her everyday.

Everyone worked hard on that last wish.

 

Erika smiled at the notice that they will get married the next day, since Purriry announced that she just had finished the wedding gown. Simple but beautiful, as she said.

"That's good. So it will be tomorrow."

"Yes. Karuto is really busy trying to make a Black Forest for the party" he laughed. "You should see him."

"My father used to say that he was afraid of when I got married because he was going to cry a lot" Erika sighed, nostalgic.

"I'm so sorry. I will always feel horrible about making you lose your family, knowing how it feels."

"It's okay. I don't want to go feeling hate and I forgave you long time ago" Erika closed her eyes, smiling, cuddling with her fiancé. "At the end you just not only made me trust you again, but you made me love you. And now we're getting married."

She tried to reach him, asking for a kiss. He helped her, putting a hand behind her head. The kiss lasted a few seconds. He enjoyed to feel her breathing on his skin, the warmth of her closeness. They separated and looked each other at the eyes.  
Her eyes fixed on his. He felt how Erika lost all of her forces.

"Erika?" he mumbled, incredulous. "Erika?" He released her and as quick as posible he tried to reach for help "Eweleïn! Help! Erika, please, no! One more day, just give me one more day!"  
  
The doctor ran and pushed the captain away from the bed with an extraordinary strenght. She used every knowledge that she had to help Erika to come back. But Valkyon just saw how the cheeks of his beloved lost her blush and her eyes lost all of their bright.

After some minutes, Eweleïn looked at him.

"I'm sorry"

A bitter scream lacerated Valkyon's throat, letting himself fall.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Erika once told him that on certain part of Earth the girls used to be buried with wedding dresses.  
That was the dress that she was using for the last farewell.

Erika was on a wood case without a cover, carved by her bereaved lover, surrounded by flowers: red dahlias, violet and pink chrystanthemums and wisterias. Her hands were crossed upon her chest. On her left hand her ring was shining. Valkyon left on her hands a bouquet with more dahlias and a sunflower. He looked at her. It was such a relief that they erased the marks of her suffering. She looked like before that, as if she was just sleeping.

He knew that everyone on the Quarters were telling him that they were afflicted by her death. He was some of the girls crying. Mery knew about everything and was crying disconsolated, hugging his crylasm. But everything felt like it happened to someone else not to him even if he were watching over her.

That day was going to be the day when they planned to promise eternal love to each other, not saying goodbye because Death reached her.

 

 

 

 

He felt worse than when his older brother died. As if his heart was being ripped from him over and over again.

"Funerals are not for the ones who leave us but for the ones who are leaved behind" Nevra said.

 The torches were ready. Everyone were on the cherry tree. The moonlight was so beautiful that night that it hurted. Everyone will say that old prayer for the Oracle to receive her on the place were everyone went when their lives are over. And then she will become little light that will float on the night, the last signal that she were not anymore between them. On that moment, Valkyon thought of Erika's mother and felt sorry for her. The woman had a daughter, the daughter died and she didn't remembered her being pregnant and raising that girl. According to Eldarya's beliefs the mothers could feel when their children died. How would it feel to lose a child that you can't remember any of their smiles?

After the ceremony, everyone went back to the quarters, silent. On his room Floppy was awaiting for him. She tighten up agains his hands, trying to make him feel better.

 

 

The man tried to remember every moment with her but it seemed like a beautiful landscape on a glass, the glass broke up and what was left wasn't as beautiful as before. Every laugh. Every tear. That time when she cooked for him that delicious potatos. That time when she punched him because of the potion. The first kiss with the sweet taste of love. That time when she took care of his wounds, after a failed mision. The first time when they both slept together. The first time that he took her. And it was unavoidable to remember the nightmare of the last months. No, he had to concentrate to remember her as she was before that: a smiling, tender girl, full of life, full of dreams. They talked about having three children, one of them will be called Lance to honor his brother.

 

What had it gotten him to allow himself to feel once more, to have loved her, if at the end he just lost her?

 

The next weeks were as if he weren't there. He obeyed orders, gave orders but everything was mechanical. He guarded Erika's stuff with diligence. Anyway everything started to lose her fragance.

 

Do reports. Train the new recruits. To forge new weapons. Eat. Shower. Sleep. Feed Floppy. The daily routine. The only thing that helped him to concentrate and keep himself sane. He tried to be away from alcohol, knowing that he was more than capable to empty Karuto's barrels.

"Valkyon?" the voice called him on dreams.

He was on the cherry tree. The place were she hugged him for the first time. It was Erika, with her wedding gown.

"It's sad that this is just a dream" the captain tried to smile. She caressed his face.

"This is the only way that I have to see you. It seems that the power that I have is to navigate on the dreams." she explained herself. "It took some time to find yours".

"I miss you".

"I know. I miss you too. But please, you have to move on"

"Without you?" His voice broke down.

"Without me, yes"

"I'm not ready to let you go or forget you".

"I'm not asking you to stop loving me as soon as the morning hits you. Just continue walking" she hugged him. "I'm grateful that I met you. You were the best part of this strange adventure. But you have to move on, Valkyon. The guard needs you".

"And you?" he asked her, noticing how she was disappearing again, with a smile.

"I will be here if you need me" she crossed her arms over her chest. "I'll always be with you. As your parents and your brother, we will always be with you".

 

 

 

The most beautiful morning that he had saw on a lot of time. The birds were singing and Floppy was biting his fingers, asking him to feed her. The dream was fading from his memory but he was fighting to make it last more seconds just to see that beautiful eyes.

His room smelled to her, as if she were there the last night. He could swear that it was posible to feel her warmth.

Valkyon sat on the border of his bed. He looked himself at the mirror. His appearance was better than the last days.

 

Finally he let the dream vanish and leaved his room.

He had so much to do and he was hungry.

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> So this is the meaning of the flowers that Valkyon gave to Gardienne (if you had readed some of my older fanfiction you will notice that I love the language of flowers).  
> -Red Dahlias: I will love you forever.  
> -Violet chrysanthemum: "I can't stand the idea of losing your love"  
> -Pink chrysanthemum: A fragile love.  
> -Wisteria: "I'm clinging to you".  
> -Sunflower: "You're my sun and as this flower I will always look at you".
> 
> The title comes from a song by Alejandro Fernandez, called "Cielo de acuarela" (Watercolor Sky/Heaven). Since "Cielo" can have the meaning of "sky" or "heaven", I decided for the second meaning, although the verse of the song that mentions the title ("Y ahora mismo nada me consuela/Ni este cielo de acuarela/ Que con lágrimas despinto" -"And now I can't found any relief, not even on this watercolor sky/heaven that I undress with my tears"-) makes an alusion to rain, so it's the sky-sky but he's so sad that he can't apreciate the beauty on it.  
> Also "Routine" by Steven Wilson helped me a lot with the last part.
> 
> I had the theory, based on some of the things that Ezarel and the guard had said that Erika isn't expected to live long on Eldarya, if not for her being clumsy, maybe for her human condition. So that's how this fanfic was born.  
> Another theory that I have, based on the episode of the kappas (and Wave to the soul) that Erika moves on dreams, because we only see the story from someone elses POV when she's asleep or inconcious. So of course she will be more powerful after reaching the "eternal sleep". Or you can interpret it just as Valkyon subconscious telling him to move on, as it happened on Wave to the soul with Erika and her dreams with the boys.
> 
> And well, I really wanted to make people cry :D and what's better than doing it after the emotional rollercoaster that was episode 15?


End file.
